I Am So Smart. S-M-R-T.

I’m a smart girl.

I could read unassisted by the time I was 4. I was often asked to read to my kindergarten class–I was the classroom “rock star.”

I was placed in the Academically Gifted program in my elementary school by third grade.

Photographic evidence of precociousness, Example One.

I excelled at math, science, spelling, reading, and just about anything else you put in front of me.

I graduated in the top 10 of my high school class. I was on the honor roll all 4 years of high school, I was in Teacher Cadet, I was a member of the National Honor Society. I received scholarships for my talents in cheerleading and writing. I got a relatively high score on my SATs, passed AP English and History with high A’s.

Purple tassel = Teacher Cadet. Gold tassel = Top 10 of Class of 1999

I went to college. I applied to and was accepted to Appalachian State University.

♥ Go ‘Neers! ♥

I also applied to and was accepted to Appalachian’s off-beat, interdisciplinary honors program, Watauga College. I was a Watauga Leader in my sophomore year, working with Freshmen on their college credits, facilitating extracurricular activities to aid in their growth, and running our Wednesday group meetings (which could be anything from 3 hour discussions on the state of local farmers to poetry readings). I attended a writer’s conference in that same year with author/mentor, Orson Scott Card.

I graduated from Appalachian State University with a bachelor’s degree in Journalism.

Proof. Further proof: I was smart enough to Photoshop out my last name. Go me!

I’m a reader.

I’m a writer.

I’m (mostly) socially aware.

I use big words like obsequious, acrimony, and ruminate. (My SAT Prep teacher would be so proud.)

So, the above-outlined individual–the one who graduated from college and uses big words–would be smart enough to re-apply sunscreen every hour for the 8-hour duration of her beach stay yesterday, right?

Wrong.